We all have to work, or for that matter interact with people on a daily basis. So if there is a way to make work a more enjoyable place to be why not give it a try? Conflict may be unavoidable in certain situations, but I have found some techniques that may help get you out of a sticky situation and have a better day!
It may not always be the easiest task, but by taking the time to be aware of your actions and respecting others you can help avoid unnecessary disagreements or bad feelings. Here are some tips:
- Make the environment comfortable for everyone to talk and encourage discussion
- Do not try to be the “winner” when discussing ideas or point of view, rather find out what the best outcome is for all involved
- Make it easy for others to share their ideas and perspectives without feeling judged or belittled
- Clarify, clarify, clarify - if someone takes offense to something you said and you don’t know why, or you assume a co-worker had bad intentions with a statement ask for clarification in a sincere respectful manner. Clarify your own intentions as well, sometimes that’s all it takes!
- Look for a mutual purpose. If you can find a common goal with a co-worker then you can work together towards that goal or purpose.
- Compromise is not an evil word! The best ideas come from combining a group of individual’s ideas to form the best solution
- Never cut people off when they are speaking, name call or insult someone’s ideas
- Praise and compliment co-workers when they have done a good job
- Do not purposely exclude co-workers from meetings or decision-making because you never know whose input could make a difference!
- Take a step back and see how your behaviors, dialogue and previous actions are impacting your current situation. Then positively modify your behaviors to make for a better outcome!
Remember, you cannot control other people’s behavior. But the choices you make and changes you create within yourself can change the way in which people interact and react to you in tough situations.
Take it one day at a time and make small changes, because it takes a long time to relearn behaviors but the payoff is worth it. Have you made positive changes that have improved relationships in your life? What tips have helped you when interacting with co-workers?
References:
1) Patterson, K., Grenny J., McMillan, R., & Switzler, A. (2002). Crucial Conversations Tools for talking when stakes are high. 1-92.
2) “How to Demonstrate Respect at Work” http://humanresources.about.com/od/workrelationships/a/demo_respect.html
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